I hate this company and myself!

I am a believer of fate. I believe everything happens for a reason(s) and we are leading to the way we meant to be. The things happened this week made me a stronger believer.

On Monday, I attended an job interview which I was very interested in. After the interview, I thought I failed and it turned out to be true. I was sitting in the central library and suddenly a thought came into my mind - how about you just quit your job? I don't know why.



And since then, I somehow made up my mind to quit this job and told my supervisor by Friday. But I was not really sure should I do this and afraid to tell him. I told a friend and reconsidered this decision. On Thursday night, I suddenly realized I was not allowed to take annual leave in notice period, which meant I couldn't attend interview and I can only find job after traveling. So I didn't thought much, I decided to stay until I find a job offer on Friday.

And I applied no-pay leave to go traveling. But I heard the management may not approve my application. I was very worried what I should if so. "It won't happen" I told myself. Because if it did, I would quit this job.

And today (Saturday), my application was approved but I had to use all my annual leave first and then no-pay leave. I was just shocked. I made the worst decision in my life. " I should have told them I resigned yesterday." I was so regret.

The company is so stupid (actually it should be the employment rules) that employees can only take annual leave after working for one year. If you really want to, you can apply advanced annual leave but they need to state the reason, as if it is their mercy to you. After working for one year, congratulation, you can finally apply your annual leave. BUT, you are not allowed to take the annual leave granted for working here in the second year. WHAT, so you share 10 annual leave in 2 years!? And it needs you to apply at least 4 days before the leave. Otherwise, you have to state the reason again.

I hate the company so much. But I hate myself more for working in this stupid company and making the stupid decisions.

So now, because I made a stupid mistake - I assumed they would allow me to take no-pay leave, I have to suffer the consequences - can only resign in Mid Sept which means I still need to work here for more than 2 months.

The worst thing is I can't take annual leave anymore. I can't attend interview until I don't work. I do afraid the time taken for me to get a new job. I do afraid I can't withstand the pressure from my mother like last year.

So what should I do in these 2 months?